Thursday, January 23, 2014

Johnny's Adventures In The Muscle World: Business As Usual


Click here for the previous part.

Molly and Little J were headed straight to home of the latter. He lived with his parents in a small apartment at the end of the town. That's why the ride took a little longer than expected and Molly had to stop at a gas station in order to, as Dr. Dre would say, “put some gas in that motherfucker”.

While she was graciously loading the car with fuel Johnny saw an employee of Crap Is Golden Gym spreading some kind of posters – Little J and California Muscle were wanted. This wasn't a big surprise since this town was pretty crazy in the first place and by the looks of it was also living according to the laws in the 19th century.

After 30 minutes...

Unfortunately for Johnny it was impossible to enter the house without talking to his mother which was both worried about the absence of her son but also somewhat happy since: “the little sissy boy was finally out of the house”.

'Hello, mother!', said Johnny with the voice of a weakling. He thought that if he pretended to be somewhat sick his mother would be a little nicer to him. False!

'Where have you been, you fucking lazy piece of crap? Did you forget who is paying for your college education, you dumb fuck!', said the loving woman who gave birth to the main character of this story.

Johnny didn't know how to respond to similar attitude, although his usual strategy was to simply say: 'Fuck you, mom!' and go watch porn in his room to which his parents used to refer as “The Den Of The Chronic Masturbator”. Luckily for Little J they were mostly doing it behind his back.

This time was different – Molly was with him and he didn't want to sound like a dick in front of her.

When Little J's mom saw that her son was actually with a girl she felt somewhat ashamed of her words but decided to continue in the same gangsta rap lyrics like style:

'Who's the whore with you? There's no place for sluts in this house.' {the mother}

'Please, mother let us in. We just have a little work to do on the computer and she will be gone.' {Johnny}

'So, she really is a whore.', replied Little J's mother while experiencing profound internal satisfaction that she was finally able to use Hollywood lines when communicating with her son.

Molly had a history of suffering caused by her obsessive mother and knew exactly how Johnny was feeling. That's why she decided to do the most rational thing a person does in similar situation. She pulled out the M-16 rifle she took from Antonio's house and said:

'Listen to your son and let us in.'

The mother didn't know how to react and so did Little J. He wasn't sure for how long he was going to live in the house of his parents but judging by the current situation his time was over.


Molly tied Johnny and his mother {she was getting pretty good at that} and went upstairs to check the video recorded by the spy camera hidden in the teddy bear. She wanted to be the first one to see what was on the tape. Everything was looking just as expected – drugs, whores, steroids – when something interested happened. Christian T, the guy to which she sold anabolic steroids, had a 10 minute tête-à-tête conversation with Antonio Montana during which men exchanged some kind of a map.

'What's on that map?' {Molly}


Click here for the next part.